Ozzfest 2006 at Alpine Valley!

Greetings MetalMortals!
It's that time of year again O' my Brothers. Ozzfest 2006 edition! I caught up with Ozzy & Co. at the Alpine Valley venue in East Troy, WI. Overall, the lineup for 2006 was weak. I give it a 6 out of 10 vs. previous years. That being said, it was still a great time and I wouldn't have missed it. These were the highlights:

1) Avenged Sevenfold performing Walk.
I have never really listened to Avenged Sevenfold, except for every time I play Madden 2006, and that my brothers, is plenty for me. However, I must give credit where it's due. Avenged Sevenfold kicked some serious ass with their cover of Pantera's Walk. Tommy Knocker is a HUGE Pantera fan and I went nuts when I heard the opening riff. Then I proceeded to have a one-man mosh pit on the lawn with my infamous wicked jack-o-lantern mask on.

2) Black Label Society. What more needs to be said? Zakk & the Doom Crew kicked ass as always. If you have never seen BLS in concert, then you need to go and see them. They always do a great show.

3) Ozzy Osbourne. Ozzy headlined the 2nd Stage, so he was out front and center at about 4:00pm. It was weird to see him in the daylight. He only played for about 50 minutes, which was a bit of a downer. Suicide Solution was the highlight for me with Zakk channeling Randy Rhoads for the solo. The rain started to pour toward the end of Ozzy's set and it was welcomed by all (temperature was 90+).

It would have been nice to remember more about the Hatebreed set, but I was struggling with the effects of the cold ones and rolled ones that were consumed during the tailgate at that point.

Disturbed was ok. I like some of their songs, but not anything to write home about. Disturbed kind of seems like "corporate" heavy metal to me.

I never thought this day would come, but I left before Ozzfest was offically over. Right before the closing act System of A Down started their set, I headed for the parking lot. System of A Down has a couple of mildly interesting songs, but for the most part they belong on Lollapalooza or some other weak ass tour. System of A Down is not metal and the lead singer doesn't really sing (ever).













Final thought....Ozzy, get back on the Main Stage and headline this thing man! That's it brothers. I'm out. I will report from BLS concert in Chicago in November, but will probably have some new posts before that!
Later,
Tommy Knocker

How to Survive a Heavy Metal Concert

How to Survive a Heavy Metal Concert
by TommyKnocker
March 2006

Chicago, IL -- What? You thought “Heavy Metal” was dead? Try telling that to the 500,000 people that attended the 10th annual Ozzfest last summer or Slipknot’s “maggots” (as the group’s fans are known) who sold out the group’s 2005 tour. I dare you.

Since MTV reduced its rotation to consist exclusively of rappers sporting bling-bling and barely legal teens with belly button rings, heavy metal has had a much lower profile than rap and pop. However, heavy metal CD sales are still strong at approximately 70 million annually, according to Nielsen SoundScan. Lamb of God’s 2005 DVD, Killadelphia, went gold in just nine weeks.

Heavy metal is not only a form of music, but a way of life for many of its fans. So, before you start looking for the next heavy metal act coming to your town, I have some straightforward advice for you.

I sat down with a few heavy metal newbies and a few battle-tested concert veterans. The result was the following list which will empower you to not only survive a live show, but tap into the raw power of heavy metal at its source.

Listen to the CD before the show. The audio quality at live shows is inherently rawer than the studio album. If you are not familiar with the band’s songs, you could be in for a long night. The volume is on 12 and the vocals won’t sound the same, but if you have heard the song before you will hear it more clearly.

If you are planning on singing/screaming/shouting/growling along, knowing some of the words also helps. “It gives you a sense of what to expect,” says Viral, a 24-year-old financial analyst and recent heavy metal convert. “When you hear it live, it’s that much more intense.”

Watch a live concert DVD. If you have never been to a heavy metal show, you must watch a DVD to see exactly what you are getting into. Pantera’s 3 Vulgar Videos from Hell DVD, which includes all of the band’s previously released footage, is excellent research material. This DVD is probably the best way to see how intense a heavy metal concert can get and help you determine if you have the balls to show up.

Do not dress for a Dave Matthews concert. A black concert t-shirt is the standard uniform for heavy metal shows. A collared shirt that you would wear to work on casual Friday or that your Grandma gave you for Christmas will probably get you killed. Wear jeans, and not the designer $100 pair of jeans that your girlfriend likes or the stone-washed ones that you wore to a Poison reunion concert.

“I definitely felt out of place. I wore a polo shirt and designer jeans,” said heavy metal rookie and information technology consultant, Shay, 24, regarding his baptism at a Black Label Society concert.

“I eventually bought a concert t-shirt [at a 1996 White Zombie concert] and wished I hadn’t waited as long as I did. It’s just part of the dress code,” said Brian, a 28-year-old home remodeler and seasoned metal fan. “Cargo shorts and combat boots are good too.”

Show respect. You will be surrounded by hardcore fans. Some of these people live and die with the group that is onstage. So, be careful before you start hurling insults within ear shot of your fellow fans.

Don’t forget about the opening acts either. While some of the time they will be horrible, a large portion of the crowd will be there specifically to see the opening acts as opposed to the headliner. So keep your eyes open and your mouth shut, got it?

Don’t be afraid. “I think there’s a stigma with heavy metal concerts. Most people associate it with tattooed bikers, mosh pits, mohawks and violence,” said Rao. “I think that this scares certain people.”

When asked why most people would never go to a heavy metal concert, Vikram, a 31-year-old consultant and Iron Maiden fan, offered “It’s the myth that heavy metal is for rednecks.”

Just keep an eye out for the guy you saw in the parking lot drinking Jack Daniel’s out of the bottle.

Do not bring your girlfriend. Especially if you are new to the heavy metal scene. You will have enough work to do keeping yourself out of danger, let alone watching over someone else. Describing the crowd at Ozzfest, Hoge saw, “A bunch of intoxicated people. Crowd confusion in the sense that you can lose people.” So, only bring your girlfriend if you want to lose her.

Don’t get too close to the stage in-between sets. After the first opening band, you may be getting comfortable with the heavy metal environment. Maybe you want to get closer to the stage for the headliner. Don’t do it (if you have watched the Pantera DVD and think you can hang, then ignore this rule.)

As you move closer to the stage, you are entering an area that will host the mosh pit and a collection of individuals that have no concept of personal space. “[The environment] changed considerably when [Ozzy] started to play. It was as if the crowd was preparing all day for Ozzy Osbourne. It happened so fast,” said ‘Whitey’, 33, an Ozzfest 2005 survivor and Sepultura fan.

Have an open mind. “I enjoyed the [Black Label Society concert in Chicago]. It was an eye opening experience. I mostly have gone to rap concerts. I definitely walked in thinking I wasn’t going to enjoy it,” said Patel.

Expect the unexpected. “The crowd was throwing chunks of sod into the air. I don't mean just a few people either, it was hundreds or thousands of people throwing sod! It was surreal!” said Whitey, commenting on Ozzfest 2005 at the South Florida Fairgrounds. “I think a heavy metal concert always has an unknown.”

In the spirit of full disclosure, some of these sod-throwers were tasered by Florida’s finest. So, don’t get too inspired, ok?

You can also see some strange things tailgating before and after the show. A few years ago at Ozzfest in Wisconsin, my brother and I were grilling burgers and dogs while downing a few (dozen) cold ones and listening to some Ozzy tunes. This 40-year-old dude wearing a black t-shirt with an alien on it and camouflage pants walks up to us and asks “can I feed one of those hot dogs to my dog?” Next thing we know, the guy’s dog is jumping into the air and snatching the hot dog out of his mouth! Rock n’ roll!

Drink too much and go f***ing crazy. Heavy metal is all about excess. Guitar solos that are too long, hair that is too long, fat chicks that pull up their shirts for too long.

Since they won’t let you play the guitar onstage, you don’t have enough time to grow your hair out and you don’t have tits (man tits don’t count), all you can do is drink too much, yell too loud and slap a high-five with somebody you don’t know. As Ozzy always advises at the start of his set, “Go f***ing craaaaaaazzzeeeeeeeeeee!”

When everybody is buzzed and possibly half-baked and the band’s best song comes on, there will be a lot of love in the air. Go ahead and get your mind right for the heavy metal equivalent of hugging your neighbor at church. And don’t forget to kick some ass!

When asked how a heavy metal concert is different from a jam band concert, Patel replied “The energy levels are totally different. Jam bands are more stand there and sway around. People just f***ing sit through the whole thing. That just wouldn’t happen at a heavy metal concert.”